Unstoppable, Yo!
November 16, 2021
Yo, homies! I guess you probably heard the news by now: the haters came after Da Bomb! That’s right, those snowflakes in my cumbaya basketball league tried to take your boi OUT! You know those liberal elite Canyon Crest parents couldn’t handle a real baller making their kids look as lame as they are. So they put a hit out on me in practice!
Of course the lamestream media is reporting it as an accident, but if you believe that, I got some helium mining stock to sell you.
It’s all good though. You think a torn rotator cuff is going to slow down Da Bomb!? That kind of injury normally take months to heal but my doctor said, “Damn Bomb, your rotator cuff has improved by 40 percent in the 10 minutes I’ve been examining you! You should be good to go in one to two weeks.”
I even got a call of support from President Trump! (The occupier in chief tried to call me too, but I hung up on his sleepy ass!)